Mind Control

So, I've been sent down again. This time it's only for four weeks. But nonetheless, it's four weeks of overnights. In February. No daylight. It's cold. Ice on the roads. No biking.

Part of what I purport to like about my job are the challenging hours. I like seeing just how far I can push myself. And these hours are a good way to test that. I quickly discovered that it's not so much the sleep factor, although that does matter, but the mental factor. The way to get through these challenges is to stay mentally fit. Not to let my mental concentration waver. Once I do that, I'm afraid it would all be downhill. I can't think too hard about what I am doing (ie getting up in the middle of the night for a 4am, or completely flipping my schedule for an overnight). Otherwise it gets too crazy.

But when will I get to a point where I can say, ok I've proved it? I am mentally strong and determined. How many overnights do I have to do? And who I am proving this to? Obviously to myself because in the past I've often described myself as a bit of a mental weakling. But I've been going strong for ages now. I haven't let this get me down despite the mental and physical challenge of it all. I actually do think I am strong now!

I think this latest four week sentence is just long enough. As my roommate pointed out this evening before I left for work, this bout will seem harder because I have had a taste of life back on the dayside. And I think everyone is just much better served by my positive happy demenor when I work days.

At least when I wake up it will be Spring.